A Different Kind of Weekend

"The greatest weakness of most humans is the hesitancy to tell others how much they love them while they're alive.'

~Orlando A. Battista

This weekend was life's version of "A Tale of Two Cities" for me. While it had it's high points- Friday at the aquarium with my girls, lunch at Tom and Chee, Saturday dinner and show with old friends and Sunday dinner with the family-one sentence spoken by a friend blindsided me and filled me with sorrow.

For five years I worked with a wonderful woman who was my friend, confidante and partner in crime. She was also a nurse and while we didn't work in the same office, we worked for the same company and spoke almost daily for the biggest part of those five years.  Just a few years older than me, she had always been open about the fact that she would probably work well into her 60s, her husband was on disability and hadn't been able to work in years, she was their sole support.

I left that company two years ago and unfortunately our interaction was reduced to Facebook posts and an occasional email.  My life was busy- a new job, newborn twins, a new house, time to enjoy fun stuff.  I was blessed.  I am going to share part of an email I got from her last September.

Cris,
It occurred to me, since I haven't heard from you, that maybe you completely missed the news of my Cancer diagnosis. I wanted to give you the chance to know about what is going on with me.


Back on May 25, I suddenly developed symptoms of a brain tumor out of the blue. Approx 1month later, I was diagnosis with an Astrocytoma, grade 4. Not sure how much you know about that diagnosis. I knew nothing. It's not good, but I intend to make it good.

Anyway, the standard treatment is radiation, chemo, and at my age, certain death within a relatively short time. This is not going to happen.

Instead, my wonderful husband researched and found an alternative product which I am taking, instead of chemo, with every hope and belief that the outcome is going to be much better, and I plan to Iive a long time. I am taking Radiation. I am about 1/2 thru that.

I don't know if you were aware of any of this, and if you even are interested, but since I did not hear anything from you, I thought I should give you the opportunity to be aware.

I am not working, nor do I intend to return to work.

I am feeling quite healthy, especially now that the meds I am on are pretty much controlled. So basically I stay busy doing what I want to do at home, and even go out for enjoyment sometimes. Dinner, shopping, visiting.

So I am assuming that you completely missed this info, and thought you might want to know.I am not letting you know because I want any kind of sympathy, don't need it since I am doing well.

If you are interested, my phone number is ---, I would like to hear from you, but that's entirely up to you.

The truth is, I did know about her diagnosis, just not sure what I would say if we talked.  I am a nurse, for God's sake, what a lame excuse... Saturday night I ran into a mutual friend and asked about her.

She died six weeks ago.

I am feeling ashamed.  I did email her back at the time, but I never called.  Did she die thinking I really didn't care? I think about all the people I am friends with on Facebook who still work for that company.  Not one mentioned anything.  I am forced to re-examine my priorities.  She didn't have to work into her 60s, but I am sure she didn't think she would ever work until she died. This past weekend we attended two funerals and got word of another passing yesterday- all parents of friends of ours.

Yes, A Tale of Two Weekends...

Love,
C.