Are you planning on braiding that?

Men's magazines often feature pictures of naked ladies. Women's magazines also often feature pictures of naked ladies. This is because the female body is a beautiful work of art, while the male body is hairy and lumpy and should not be seen by the light of day.

-Richard Roeper


Ok, I have professed that I am not a winter person. However, I will admit that I find one advantage to the winter months...you don't have to shave your legs. Long gone are the daily shaves, and it's hard for me to believe that as a 12 year old I wanted to shave my legs so badly that I used to sneak behind my mother's back. I sometimes think that I should have been European, where women are hairy and dangerous, and no one thinks anything of it.

Unlike the summer months when legs are expected to be hairless, tanned and toned, winter legs can be dry, flaky, hairy and pasty white. Of course one's husband or significant other has to be subjected to this, but I can usually get away with days of not shaving before Mark notices. I guess I've pushed things a little too far. Last night, in the most loving voice he could muster, Mark asked me "Are you planning on braiding that hair on your legs?"

Now,it really isn't that bad. Well, it is bad, but I certainly can't braid it. I tried to explain to him that there was a reason for it. 1. It's winter, I need the extra warmth. 2. I'm wearing long pants, no one sees it. If I wear a skirt, I am wearing boots and tights and still no one sees it. 3. I'm really busy, I don't have time. 4. My legs are long. I have a 36 inch inseam, it's quite a chore. 5. I need to buy more razor blades, I think there are only three in the cabinet. 6. I haven't been able to convince Mitchell's or NVogue to offer leg shaving (I'm not into waxing) as a spa service. 7. My daughter-in-law is Italian, I'm trying to relate more to her. He's not buying any of it.

So, I guess I'll break down and shave my legs. But it's going to have to be this weekend, when I'm well rested and have lots of time. Just when it was getting nice and soft...